Saturday, December 11, 2010

Neyland's Hollywood Round Up

Howdy kids.  Neyland D. Catt back for a second post in two days.  That's practically a record!  I haven't bashed on all the Hollywood types in a while, so today is my day to get my fix!  Prepare yourselves for a round of informative mockery of the latest happenings in Entertainment Town...

First up: Miley Cyrus smokes a bong in a video!

Gasp!  Say it ain't so!  Let's face it, Miley is not a little kid anymore.  She is a young adult now.  Young adults, especially those with lots of money and fame, see their IQ's drop by at least half for a period of around 8 to 10 years.  They will do extraordinarily stupid things just because they have the option to.  This is the period of time that nature uses to try and kill off the truly, terminally stupid.  I won't even get into the debate of whether she was smoking salvia or marijuana.  Really doesn't matter much.  My gut tells me that Miley will survive her wild-child years with at least some of her dignity intact.  However, she will probably end up on Dancing With The Stars at some point.  Not sure what will remain of her dignity after that.

"The Hasselhoffs" Cancelled after 2 episodes!


Wow.  Didn't even make it long enough to get re-runs to air forever in Germany.  This is good news folks.  This struck a blow for good taste across the world.  Combine this with his hasty exit from Dancing With The Stars and you have a clear message:  America is sick of David Hasselhoff!  Seriously, dude, if you were a cat, you'd have used up all 9 lives 15 years ago.  Give it up.  The whole Zombie craze is starting to fade anyway.*

Racy Pics of Christina Aguilera leaked!


Not really sure this news.  Christina has been "racy" for as long as I can remember.  Maybe they were pictures of her fully clothed and being demure?  It amazes me that stars are shocked when stuff like this comes out.  Really?!  You were surprised that pictures of you in some bondage outfit made it to the internet?  There was someone standing right in front of you with a camera!  Taking pictures!  In this day and age, everyone and I do mean EVERYONE, has a digital gizmo on them at all times.  Chances are it can take pictures.  Or video.  Or 3D.  Or 4D with smell-o-vision.  The point is, if you don't want the video of you making out with an armadillo showing up on the internet, then don't make out with the armadillo.  Or at least check him for cameras first.

SpaceX launches Dragon capsule into orbit!


What does this have to do with Hollywood you might ask?  Nothing.  Except that once again, we sent a spaceship off the planet and missed the opportunity to send Lady GaGa with it!


See you kids later!  I'd write more, but I have to go take a wiki-leak.**

Neyland D. Catt



*Neyland actually believes that David Hasselhoff is a zombie.  I've tried correcting him, but he does offer up some compelling evidence.

**He has no idea what the whole Wikileaks thing is all about.  He has simply borrowed the term to describe going to the bathroom.  That's my boy.

9 comments:

  1. What a fun blog you have!!
    Stopping by from Friday Follow blog hop. Hope you get a chance to check out my blog, http://discoverdirectselling.blogspot.com/
    Have a wonderful weekend! Blessings,
    Nancy

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  2. Hi there, I'm blog hopping today! I'm a new follower - I found you on Home Grown Families. I have a food blog that is geared towards making healthy and fun kids lunches, and I'm a Blogger.com 'Blog of Note'. I hope you'll follow me back -

    http://bentobloggy.blogspot.com/

    Thanks!!

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  3. I did my junior year abroad in vienna when hasselhoff's "greatest hits" came out. i couldn't escape "I'ma looking for a freeeedom".

    blech.

    Visiting from the hop.

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  4. I'm your newest follower, I found you through the Swingin' by Sunday blog hop! Come follow me too! :)
    http://curliegirlie03.blogspot.com

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  5. I thought I was already following you, but I guess that darn Google tricked me again! Anyhow,

    I am NOW following you through the Swingin' by Sunday Blog Hop. I hope you'll do the same! You can find me @ http://sofiasideas.com/

    Sofia's Ideas

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  6. Out hopping, come on by Lucy's when you get a chance. http://closertolucy.blogspot.com

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  7. Have to agree with you Neyland... Christina hasn't got much left to show off that the public hasn't seen... I'm honestly surprised that Miley hasn't been caught doing worse... or maybe she has and I just don't care... thanks for the updates from Hollywood - since I gave up cable I feel out of the loop! Thanks for linking up at Thirsty for Comments at www.actingbalanced.com today!

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  8. Hi! It's Sarah - I am a new follower from Thirsty for Comments Thursday. Love the post. Just the name Hasselhoff makes me want to vomit...really. Ick.

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  9. hahameow...gotta take a wikileak. Wonder if that will be part of the Urban Dictionary for 2011?

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